El Smacko

How do you smack up a fortune cookie and make it better? Like this.

Smacked That Bolognese Up and Down

Found a right proper recipe for a bolognese sauce at epicurious.com.

It was just what I was looking for in the likes of simple, hearty-rich goodness, but like many people with at least half a conscience, I have a problem with eating veal. I know, I know. All I see is big, round baby cow eyes blinking back big, round silvery shimmering tears -- with those soft little puppy-belly velvety cherubic faces and wet, thin black patent-leather strips for noses -- I just can't do it.*

I can't do pigs either mostly since my dog looks like a big black pig, and I just can't find a Pulled Otis Sandwich appetizing. But man...bacon...so do I go both ways on the subject? I guess. Sometimes.

Whatever. Point is: I cooked up a big stainless-steel copper-bottomed skilletful of this recipe with the basic ingredients listed and only a couple of substitutions and just a few additions to the spices. Subbed ground turkey for the veal and pork.

Turkey meat always has a little sweetness to it when cooked up, but thankfully it isn't sweet in the face department. Sheehhshhsh. 

I do mind saying this but will anyway: in the past 24 hours, I've made a total Otis out of myself eating the whole batch.

There. I admit it. I did it. But. Even Googie -- the pickiest, most discriminating puss on the planet -- gave this version of turkey bolognese sauce "two claws" up. Honestly. But since I smack'd up this sauce by smackin' down the fat content without losing the flavor, I only have so far to jog to make up for it.




Original recipe follows with substitutions noted in red.

Bolognese Sauce Smack'd Around with Turkey
(Servings: Makes about 8 cups 6 cups)

Ingredients:

2 medium onions, finely chopped
4 celery ribs, finely chopped
2 medium carrots, finely chopped
5 garlic cloves, thinly sliced
1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
1/4 lb pancetta or slab bacon, ground by butcher or thinly sliced and pulsed in food processor until finely chopped I omitted the bacon/pancetta only because I couldn't find what I wanted in my ghetto K-Roger, but use it, use it, use it.
1 lb ground veal
1 lb ground pork (not lean) Sub 1.5-2.0 lbs of ground turkey 85/15 version
1 (6-oz) can tomato paste
also added in a can of SunGold diced tomatoes that contained basil, oregano and garlic
1 cup whole milk 2% milk
1 cup dry white wine
1 cup water
1 teaspoon fresh thyme leaves Italian blend of sage, oregano, rosemary, thyme - to release the flavor of dried herbs, sand it between your palms over the mixture
1 1/4 teaspoons kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper


Preparation:

Cook onions, celery, carrot, and garlic in oil in a 6- to 8-quart heavy pot over moderate heat, stirring occasionally, until softened, about 5 minutes.

Add pancetta, veal, and pork and turkey and cook over moderately high heat, stirring and breaking up lumps, until no longer pink, about 6 minutes.

Stir in tomato paste, diced tomatoes, milk, wine, water, and thyme blend of Italian herbs and gently simmer, covered, until sauce is thickened, 1 to 1 1/2 hours. Add salt and pepper and remove from heat.

Sauce may be made 2 days ahead and cooled, uncovered, before chilling, covered. Frozen, it keeps for 1 month.

*Unless you count that wine tasting/food pairing event I went to -- give me four glasses of wine to taste up to the main course, and I will eat baby cow plus ask the waiter for a marrow bone to some sort of well-heeled and pretentious hypocrite. Eh. Life's good anyway.